I Can Do Hyderabad All By Myself

It is really exciting to be abroad again for the first time in six years. (not counting Montreal, which is a wonderful city with wonderful bagels) My first two days in India have been slow but thoughtful. I've gotten some time to walk halfway around Hussain Sagar Lake in Hyderabad. I hope I will get … Continue reading I Can Do Hyderabad All By Myself

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Space Force Monsters 8: The BK Originalist Chicken

Background: A successful product of space monster labs, The BK Chicken, aka "BK Chicken Whopper", aka "BK Chickenshit Sandwich", was formed from clay by the Space Monsters for the Constitution, a group dedicated to destroying America. The BK Chicken doesn't want to be known for demolishing skyscrapers; he insists he's just a regular family space monster who … Continue reading Space Force Monsters 8: The BK Originalist Chicken

Space Force Monsters 7: OPEN LETTER FROM AN ANONYMOUS SPACE FORCE MONSTER

I received an anonymous e-mail this morning and have decided to publish it in full: "Dear Dakota McKee, I am writing to you because I noticed you recently began a series of profiles about space monsters with the intent of rallying support for a human Space Force. Implicit is the concern that the alien space … Continue reading Space Force Monsters 7: OPEN LETTER FROM AN ANONYMOUS SPACE FORCE MONSTER

Space Force Monsters 6: Pruitticorn

Background: Before the space monsters declared war on America, Pruitticorn actually sued Planet Earth for not letting space monsters kill humans fast enough. Therefore, as a bit of an in-joke, Pruitticorn was briefly in charge of the "Space Monsters Human Protection Program", before an unfortunate incident with hand lotion forced him into temporary retirement. Evil Superpowers: … Continue reading Space Force Monsters 6: Pruitticorn

Space Force Monsters 5: Lady #MAGA

Background: The daughter of powerful space monsters, Lady #MAGA doesn't believe anyone can read her poker face ... but nobody interprets her photogenic smiling, while space monsters destroy our cities, as inscrutable, so much as tone-deaf. Space monsters separate human children from their parents at the atmospheric boundary layer? Lady #MAGA poses with her alien … Continue reading Space Force Monsters 5: Lady #MAGA

Space Force Monsters 4: No. 2 Pence ill

Background: No. 2 Pence Ill doesn't call the shots, okay? He's not No. 1 Pence ill. That's somebody else. He'll always be No. 2. Even though appointing Yacht Syndrome as Space Monster of Education was his idea. Appointing Pruitticorn as the Space Monster of Littering was also his idea. The Mnuchin Massacre? The Zinke Deficiency? … Continue reading Space Force Monsters 4: No. 2 Pence ill

Space Force Monsters 3: Bolt-Goat

Background: Bolt-Goat is an inventor. The giant steampunk mailbox (see above)? That was his idea. Bolt-Goat is a thought leader.  He's also been characterized by his peers as evil, hyper-aggressive and all-around batshit insane. This is incorrect. Bolt-Goat is goatshit insane. Special Powers: Harassing U.N. representatives. Growing out evil mustaches. Scaring people. Seriously, Bolt-Goat is … Continue reading Space Force Monsters 3: Bolt-Goat